No Elf On This Shelf

I will always cherish these days of childhood–the constant cuddles, the waking 3x at night, the pure joy at the sight of snow, the scream crying because car seat, the absence of a Facebook profile so they don’t see what shenanigans the elf on the shelf is up to at the cool moms’ houses.

As if there weren’t enough mandatory activities with parenting–diaper changing, making a lunch no one eats every day, being up 3x a night, here struts that damn elf with that ridiculous grin on his face.


Also the whole Big Brother is watching you element?


Also I have to be clever for 24 days? I give me 3 nights before forgetting for a week while my 4yo silently worries each night that Pudding Sparklepants forgot about her.


Also just no.

Who’s with me? Who loves their elf? I want to know. I have one more year before these kids start talking and my oldest asks me where her elf is. And you know when she asks, my hardline will evaporate. 😂

6 thoughts on “No Elf On This Shelf

  1. If it is any comfort, I grew up in a single-parent household with very little money. I was thrilled with all of my family’s Christmas traditions. It never occurred to me to compare notes with any other child. So even if your kids hear about Elf on the Shelf, they may not actually care.

    I hate Elf on the Shelf. SO expensive. $30 for a stupid elf that looks exactly like the one my grandmother had on her tree thirty years ago? Yeah, no. Although I do like the idea of dressing him up in a cheerleader outfit and buying him a pet (that’s apparently the new thing – pets and outfits. Elf on the shelf in the new Barbie).

  2. Thank you for this post! We also are an Elf-less home and I have had the same thoughts (what will I say when D is older and hears from her friends that they have elves). I am FB friends with one of D’s school friend’s mom and I know she has an Elf on a Shelf so I’m dreading this conversation. Any advice for how to basically tell my 4 year old that we will remain an Elf-less home??? I am not a fan of the Big Brother element. Nor am I fan of adding one more thing on my to-do list after working, making dinner, bath, bedtime, cleaning dishes and laundry. No.

  3. Thank goodness my kids were grown and out of the house before the elf became such a celebrity! Who needs extra things on their ‘to-do’ list at this time of year? Not me! I still have 2 elves that were mine when I was young. But they’re very well behaved…and I’m keeping it that way! 🙂

Let's chat!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.