I do not have it all together. At all. It came to my attention, talking to a friend the other night, that it appears I’m doing it all–masterfully juggling a business and family-of-four life. I’m seriously not…at all.

Not perfect, but happy

I do try to approach life from the positive and silly side. And I share that here because I’d rather make you smile or giggle when you turn to social media to de-stress from the latest tantrum, giant kid mess, or “Um, I know I’m a parent, but what am I supposed to do?” moment. My truths are:

1. I’m silly but I also battled postpartum depression for the first year of Ivy’s life. She recently turned 13mo, so I’m just now coming back to my “old self” — meaning that it is less of an effort to find the happy, be patient, and take deep breaths.

2. I LOVE the business and parenting juggle, but that means lots of takeout, husband cooking, feeling torn when I really want to finish a piece but Phee wants to play “dance party” or Ivy wants to cluster feed.

3. I’m creating, getting orders out in one business day, keeping up with accounting, marketing and touching base with customers on multiple social media platforms throughout the day. I’m NOT remembering to reply to personal emails, I entirely forgot to attend two parties we were invited to last year, I forget to send cards to friends and family on important holidays, I don’t read for fun or exercise much anymore.

But I love this life and this juggling act as I grow my family and brand together. I choose to find happiness and enthusiasm in the daily, weekly, monthly struggles. So am I as happy as I seem on social media? Yes! Am I silly with happiness every moment of the day? Nope! But I always look for the happy as soon as I can and pass it on, because I know how hard it is to find it some days, so I’d like people to know they can find it in my space.

Am I juggling it all masterfully? Not at all, but I feel like I finally have the mom and business parts down (this week), but always at the expense of personal life, common courtesy, and a good long solo run.

What keeps me going on a path of positivity is knowing that, like my iPhone’s battery, nothing lasts forever–tantrums, business ebbs and flows, naps, frustrations, and even those silly moments playing “dance party.” Embrace as much as you can, the parts that you want, and focus on finding the happy and emphasize it.

These nerds in my workshop. We’re not working.